Thursday, January 10, 2008

maybe it's the crazy clouds

If you have a counter in your blog you probably take a peek at what people are looking for when they are lead to your page. On Statcounter it's called the "Keyword Analysis". And, boy, is this fun!

Unfortunately this information is deleted after a while and if you don't write it down you will lose some moments of pure bewilderment...Nevertheless, looking at my current archive here are some of ludicrous pearls:

1. "james lloyd the shoe rapist"
This is not the first time my blog has been researched by foot fetishists, ever since I wrote about a news-piece on a man that went crazy and started killing women with beautiful feet.

2. "how to make christmas for everyone"
Is it me or has Christmas passed already? You're a bit late, sir/lady.

3. "using pen in diff ways than writing"
Ok, this is getting a little out of hand!!!....

4. "fiona apple mugs"
It is my personal life goal to have a mug with Fiona Apple's face on it. Ok, the woman looks nice but that's it. Unless they meant mugshots...but I don't recall Fiona being arrested. I could be wrong.

5. "men are more stronger than woman"
I bet this was the work of a man! Of an illiterate man, for that matter.

6. "american politics suck"
I never said that! ...

Other trends on my keywords:
- Most of the people that come to my blog through search engines are obsessed with pride: "greek pride"; "portuguese pride tattoos" (maybe I should try one of these); "enfp pride" (should a person be proud to be an enfp? or perhaps they're trying to relate pride to this psychological profile);

- Another great majority of the people that drop by want to weigh love, to measure love, to assess they ask tons of questions about love being stronger than: death, life, pride, me, ...Should I buy a scale? Or a thermometer?

- I once did a few blog quizzes with stupid names like "kissing purity test", "great leaders test", "movie quiz" this day people come here looking for that or similar things such as "teen purity test" - how teen can you be? 110%?

- I love when people tell Google to do things or ask questions. For example: "tell me if love is stronger than pride" haha it kills me! Google, does my bum look big in this?
- Someone came here after typing: "looking forward to seeing you soon" - why??? What did you expect to find here? But seriously, I am, I am looking forward to seeing you soon.


Preeti Shenoy said...

Hee hee--you said it so well and 'gave it back' so nicely!I too do that (looking up keywords through which people come to my blog)and one phrase I find often is 'Horny mother'!!I bet they are so disappointed after reading the post!

kimananda said...

I love how it's often so clear how people got to our blogs via a certain search, but at the same time, how clear it is that the context that we used whatever words was just so...different than than the searcher has in mind! I get a lot of people looking for fortune-telling over at my place.

Violet said...

that is so funny!
I'll go see if I can find that in my blog, I doubt it'll be as funny though.

Roam2Rome said...

This was hilarious! You had me rolling here, hehe...


"Pink Elephants"... oh, I get so many hits from people googling "Pink Elephants!" When 5 different people in one day did this, I started to wonder. Gee...

Devil Mood said...

PS: Oh my God! Really? hahahaha!

Kim: Yes, I can imagine. This is such an invasive tool isn't it? Nobody is safe googling for anything...

Violet: Tell me about it later. Writing lyrics usually brings a lot of people to the blog, I find.

R2R: Really? Pink elephants? Where did that came from? haha it's funny!

Miss Iyer said...

haha. it IS crazy! I've had people stop by using some crazy searches too :P

x said...

greek pride, that is so WEIRD
the first is my favourite, the shoe rapist.
i don't have a statcounter anymore, but this is fun, i must get one hehe

holy chaos said...

US politics does suck! lol

What a cool post. I did not know you could do that. I am going to check this out.

Unknown said...

Hi there! Thank you very much for commenting to me for a Happy Birthday, I greatly appreciate the visit!
Where in Portugal are you?
My father is Portuguese. He was born on Madeira Island though.
I loved the weird things people search often wonder what they were thinking!

Devil Mood said...

Miss Iyer: haha we're so mean ;)

Chloe: Don't be so anti-patriotic, girl ;) I imagine your blog also involves a bunch of crazy searches and this also makes a good post ;)

Holychaos: Get, it's free and a very good service. And have fun!

Gillian: Hi! Thanks for dropping by. I'm in Porto. I read you refering to the portuguese as "my people" ;) so I decided to investigate as well.

Stephanie said...

I LOVE this post. I added my stat counter in a fit of paranoid growing pains a long time ago (one of my run ins with a self-googling band which ended up being really funny, once I got over being found out), but now it is mostly a source of amusement for the poor, unsuspecting googlers who end up at my blog.

On the one hand google hits on a random collection of our words which might be in posts not even connected to each other, and on the other, I feel strangely obligated to help them out.

My most common are macrame owl after I wrote about a set decoration at a Wilco show (people actually want to find out how to make one!) and chicken farmer I still love you which I actually went back and investigated and then wrote about because it was hard to find and I was curious too. The most obvious are people looking for lyrics or chords to the song my blog title comes from, and the weirdest ever was Richard Buckner Selling Underwear because I can't imagine that ever happening.

PS - Google some of yours to find out where you appear on the results. Foot fetish man might have gone through hundreds of results to click on you. That's where it gets even weirder.


Devil Mood said...

Stephanie, don't be sorry. I enjoy it!
I know, sometimes I follow their links and find that the foot fetichist comes in page 55 of Google or something LOL ...Creepy!

Your results are immensely funny, macrame owl...that must be terrible!! And I remember your post titled Chicken Farmer I still love you hehehe

Niall young said...

is so fuuny!..I do read my stat counter stats often but usually to see where people live in realationt countries.I'll go check the key word enries now!

Scholiast said...

haha, I'd forgotten about these, rarely check anymore... But I did just now - still about 75 % hits come from 'proud to be Greek' (I once posted that list, a good one...) -- the rest was mostly 'rufus jörn' :) But there was also "how to tell someone that they are wonderful" (a sound search!) and the very optimistic "my summer holiday short essay for high school" (looking for me to do his/ her work there ... can't remember I ever wrote anything of the sort, but perhaps I should?)

Thanks for listing, it's good fun :D

Anonymous said...

ok you just made my Sunday...that's the funniest shiz I've read in a long time! You're such an interesting gal...then again it may be the crazy clouds lol

Devil Mood said...

Niall: Yes, I used to pay more attention to that too. It's fun!

Scholiast: Perhaps you should write that essay and charge for every copy :) So Greeks are proud after all!

Chrispito: perhaps it's the clouds but I'm really glad to have lightened up your day!

Anonymous said...

That is so interesting. I wrote a post about the best places to hide presents, and I actually had searches that said, "Where does my Mom hide my presents.." several of them!

phish said...

i have voyuer, fish, deadly.

and i dont know what to do with it.

Devil Mood said...

SusieJ: ahahah that's so funny!! thanks for dropping by!

Phish: I'm sure you have enough creativity to do many crazy things with those searchwords!

Anonymous said...

I love yours too! What's up with this year-round Christmas stuff?

Devil Mood said...

SusieJ: I didn't realize you had commented on this already. It was YOU who mentioned people looking for their Christmas presents. lol I'm sorry!